Thursday, January 23, 2014

Cleveland Browns Hire Mike Pettine, LOL

by Steve

After three interviews 10+ other candidates and three plus weeks of interviewing such luminaries as Greg Schiano, Mike Munchak and Josh McDaniels the Cleveland Browns today announced the hiring of Bills defensive coordinator Mike Pettine.  Sorry if I find this laughable, but I do.

Granted, I liked Pettine as the Bills defensive coordinator but as the head coach of the Browns?  Holy smokes!  I don't get it.  He was the Bills DC for one freaking year.  Yes they improved in a lot of statistical categories but did anyone watch the Bills at any time this season and think, damn this defense is dominant, who is their DC?

The Bills finished 10th in yards allowed but were 28th against the run!  They were gashed every single time (seemingly) when they needed a big stop and specifically towards the end of the year.  How many running backs did the Bills single handily invent in 2013?

Didn't the Browns already have a top ten defense? They needed an offensive mind to develop a quarterback. Alright fine the Browns literally (orrr figuratively?) had no other option, so be it. Let's look at this from the Bills perspective.

A coordinator is a coordinator. The talent is what makes the team ultimately. The scheme Pettine brought in was clearly better than what Stachestedt did the year before but the pass rushing was already there with the Williams' and Dareus. Two years ago there was no Lawson, Kiko or Branch either.  What may hurt just as much with Pettine leaving is the idea that he'll probably take all the assistants with him.

Then again, did the Seahawks really miss Gus Bradley last year? Obviously no.  Presumably any one can step in, see that the aggressive style the Bills used last year worked (at least in the passing game) and replicate it.  The bigger question is how to stop the god damn run. 

Bring in an old washed up bitch like Wade "Gomer" Phillips?  Why not, he was smart enough to start Rob Johnson over Flutie against Tennessee and Ralph barely remembers who he is.  Or bring in Greg Williams!  The guy is intense and knows how to effect the head.  Or try to poach some other coordinator.

What's more important at the end of the day is keeping Jairus Byrd, hoping Stephon Gilmore shakes his bust status and Marcell Dareus gets a new alarm clock.

Friday, January 17, 2014

NFL Conference Championship Picks

The penultimate football Sunday, here are the Conference Championship picks w Wreck destroying the playoffs:

Steve 45-47-1 Best Bet 11-8 Playoffs 5-3

49ers +3 @ Seahawks
Broncos -5 v Patriots
Patriots @ Broncos over 56.5
49ers @ Seahawks over 39.5

Coast 43-48-2 Best Bet 10-9 Playoffs 4-4

49ers +3 @ Seahawks
Patriots +5 @ Broncos
Patriots @ Broncos under 56.5
49ers @ Seahawks over 39.5

Wreck 52-42 Best Bet 12-7 Playoffs 8-0

Patriots +5 @ Broncos
Patriots @ Broncos under 56.5
Seahawks -3 v 49ers
49ers @ Seahawks under 39.5

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Bills Bring in DE Willie Jefferson

By Steve

Per this site the Buffalo Bills are bringing in former Texans cast off Willie Jefferson for a work out and a possible futures contract. Who cares you may ask, well I do.

First of all the guy is huge, 6'5+ and has been kicked off not one but two teams and he's only 23. Who doesn't love a big monster who can rush the quarterback and has a bad streak. Lest we forget Jerry Hughes will be a free agent after next season and will prob get PAID.

Jefferson's problems started back at Baylor when ya boy Briles cut his ass from the team. Who was he with and why was he cut you may ask? How about fellow wide receiver (yes he was a WR for Baylor at the time) Josh freaking Gordon!

And not only was he with Gordon but he was passed out stoned in a Taco Bell drive thru! You can't make this shit up.

Move onto Houston where he was cut in October for alleged weed use in a cigar in the team hotel. Who cares? The team was in free fall and Kubiak was desperate for any change to spark the team. Instead the team went into free fall and Id imagine the Texans could have used this dude down the stretch.

Sign his ass Whaley.

Saturday, January 11, 2014

Divisional Round Playoff Picks

Steve 42-46-1 Best Bet 10-8 Playoffs 2-2

49ers -1  @ Panthers
Seahawks -9.5 v Saints
Patriots -7.5 v Colts
Chargers +9 @ Broncos

Wreck 48-42 Best Bet 11-7 Playoffs 4-0

Chargers +9 @ Broncos
49ers -1  @ Panthers
Patriots -7.5 v Colts
Saints +9.5 @ Seahawks

Coast 40-47-2  Best Bet 9-9 Playoffs 1-3

49ers -1  @ Panthers
Saints +9.5 @ Seahawks
Colts  +7.5 @ Patriots
Chargers +9 @ Broncos

Sunday, January 5, 2014

The Bills 2013 Free Agents

by Steve

A slow long boring offseason is upon us Bills fans early in January as per usual.  Since there is always something to talk about, lets talk about the Bills free agents heading into the offseason and what Whaley should do:

Jairus Byrd S
You gotta sign the guy. Whether that means $8+ mil and franchising his ass again so be it.  After being a second team All Pro a second time the guy is going to want top dollar.  There is no better replacement so if they don't keep him the position will 100% be worse.  When you don't have to over pay a quarterback (mostly because they haven't had a good one in 15 years) you should be able to use money to over pay other dudes.  Byrd needs to be over paid.

Jim Leonhard S
Do I really want the Bills to RESIGN Jim Leon-hard?!? Wow.  He is a decent back up/role player and has been on winning teams.  Keep him around on the cheap.

Alex Carrington DE/DT
He is coming off a bad injury after just two games.  He is only 26 and seems to fit the defensive scheme.  Does any other team even know who this guy is?  Give him a one year deal and see what happens.

Arthur Moats OLB
Good guy bad player.  The Bills need wayyy better linebackers.

Scott Chandler TE
This guy is the definition of average.  He was the 26th highest paid player at his position and will want a raise after posting decent stats (53 655) but only had two touchdowns. Peace out dawg, the Bills need to get better.

Frank Summers FB
Is a fullback really needed in this offense?  I'd rather have another decent running back.  It comes down to Evan Rodriguez or Frankie.

Dan Carpenter K
The Bills have a young draftee stashed on the IR and I wouldn't be surprised if the Bills want to prove that Dusty Hopkins was worth a 6th round selection. Carps killed it this year and may get a big contract.  I'd say Kid Rock is worth it, fuck Hopkins.

Brian Moorman P
Give me a break. Punters are a dime a dozen.  This isn't a league where sentimentality means a god damn thing.  Find someone bigger younger and better.

Thomas Welch OT
No clue, is he better than Pears?  Anyone realize Pears and Cordy G started every snap this season?

Antoine McClain G
Exclusive rights FA, bring him into camp.

Chris 7/11 Hogan WR
Ha, peace out brotha

Still too early to really analyze the free agency class so I'm not even going to bother yet.  Bring back 6 of the eleven free agents avoid free agent wide receivers and concentrate on a linebacker and a cornerback.

Saturday, January 4, 2014

Wild Card Playoff Picks

Regular season recap, all three went combined 2-13 in week 17, holy shit!  Wreck wins the regular season overall, Steve second, Steve and Wreck tie best bet record.  Now on to the Wild Card Weekend!

Steve 40-44-1 Best Bet 10-7

Bengals -7 v Chargers
Colts +2 v Chiefs
Saints @ Eagles over 54.5
49ers -2.5 @ Packers

Wreck 44-42 Best Bet 10-7

Saints +3 @ Eagles
Colts +2 v Chiefs
Chargers +7 @ Bengals
49ers -2.5 @ Packers

Coast 39-44-2 Best Bet 8-9

Colts +2 v Chiefs
Bengals -7 v Chargers
Packers +2.5 v 49ers
Eagles -3 v Saints

2013 NFL Predictions Recap

by Steve

Way back in September I predicted all of the NFL's teams total wins here. Well, evidently I don't know shit because I went 12-20, yes, EIGHT more wrong than correct in a league of 32 teams.  So maybe I don't know jack shit and you morons saying so might be smarter than me. Orrr I just got unlucky.

At least I posted the results though, right?